Jeffs zanpakuto

Name:Flamey
Zanpakuto Spirit Appearance: Animal

Zanpakuto Spirit Personality: Kind and noble and talks if i'm in trouble.
Release Phrase:BURN
Family:Fire
Level: Shikai

Sealed Zanpakuto:It looks like a long sword

Shikai: A long sharp sword. The sword is made of flames.

Shikai Ability: Makes flames and whatever burns painfully. Can launch fireballs or corrosive acid or can just generally make anything burn like hell who comes to close.The heat is emitted from large quantities of rietsu.He can also not be frozen fore he is to hot because of his rietsu

Techniques:Makes anything it touches burn and hurt like they had just burnt themselves with a lighter on contact with the sword.. It can launch out and be controlled by my hands up to 100 yards away it moves like it would in my hand when it is out of my hand because the motion my hand makes my sword makes. charge time is around 2 post duration 3 cool down 2. The heat it emits can be from a fireball that explodes to a corrosive acid.He can also do this from his zanpokuto which uses large amounts of reishi to emit heat.

https://bleach-maelstrom.rpg-board.net/t346-ryuutsume-approved

Here's an example of a good zanpakuto that you should look at to get an idea of how your abilities and techs should look. Because there are still some issues.

First off if your sword can control fire you can't have simple slashes turn people to ashes. That is so many levels of overpowered especially for a shikai. Your zan could give people minor burns along with the slashes but thats as far as I am allowing it.

Second, your technique is described incorrectly.

The first part of it is just describing how your blade is released into shikai form which is already explained earlier in your application. And again you can't just turn people to ashes by attacking them with your flame sword. There is no such thing as an insta kill on this site and especially not from a simple ability of a shikai.

The actual technique part would be the fact that it can shoot out so that is okay. However you did not give any information about how it shoots out and what you mean by "control it with my hands". Are you saying it can sometimes not just go straight out? Very unclear. How far does it go and for how many posts can it extend also needs to be added.

Then for the duration and cooldowns you need actual post numbers, not milliseconds. There should be a certain number of posts where you cannot shoot your sword out again, I would say a two post cooldown would be appropriate.

And your flames cannot stay for a day. Should be an actual number of posts and much shorter then an entire day.

And before you mention Gin or any other character in the manga itself, keep in mind that you are on a roleplaying site and roleplaying sites operate very differently from the way that the manga itself does to keep thing fair.

look at it now k gaiz

"Shikai Ability: Makes flames and whatever burns umbariably



Techniques:Makes anything it touches burn and hurt badly. It can launch out and be controlled by my hands up to 100 yards away it moves like it would in my hand when it is out of my hand because the motion my hand makes my sword makes."

I'll be honest with you, that doesn't seem like much of an edit. Did you look up the link that Zaf gave? In it is a fairly well done fire type Zanpakuto.

What you mention as the ability is very basic, but also not very well described. I assume it's supposed to say "Makes flames and whatever it touches burns unbearably". What do you mean by "unbearably" ? That they can't handle the pain, so they roll up on the floor? If so, it needs to be changed, and if not, clarification is needed.

Your technique is more along the lines of an ability as well. Also, 100 yards is a pretty long reach. Particularly the fact that it hasn't got even a cooldown, let alone a duration or charge time, and it just comes off as being better suited to be an ability.

I'll actually go ahead and link you to my Superhuman power. While it's far from anything flashy per say, it's very basic, and I think that's what you might want to read at first. I'm far from a great writer, nor power/weapon maker, but what I make I have confidence in.

http://www.bleach-maelstrom.com/t348-natsu-s-ability-approved

Basically, what I want you to pay attention to is the way the techniques are related to the ability, but are not the same. All techniques have cooldowns and usually durations (even if the duration is 0 aka instant, it has to be mentioned) and many have charge times, all of which are based on how powerful the techniques are. It wouldn't be a bad idea to look up other powers that have been approved, and denied as well. Understanding this will without a doubt help in making powers and weapons.